It was hard and I had to make really tough decisions ... could we afford to put peppers in our salad (I chose one large orange one that set me back $2.00, but I'll use for 2 salads)? I realized that although not expensive per serving, I didn't have the cash flow to make baked beans from scratch (they have several ingredients that are all inexpensive, but that were going to break the bank this week!) and I'll be using an old university trick to turn canned ones into dinner tomorrow night. We won't be having biscuits as flour and baking powder just weren't in the budget I realized that if I only ate 1/2 a banana a day, it would leave Robin with more ... but I wasn't able to get apples for his lunch. We have medium ground beef instead of lean, noodles instead of rice. I've been joking about cheap wine, but I realized that wine would mean less food for my kids, and the need to make sure they are fed first was almost primal. I bought them lunch items I don't normally let them have (granola bars, store bought cookies, Kraft dinner) in hopes that these little treats will make them feel normal ... will help them fit in at the lunch table, and also because they were cheap and easy.
What got me the most today though was the fact that the stress was coming because of my attempt to feed my family real food. Not the frozen french fries from PEI that were cheaper than the actual potatoes from Ontario (not per meal, but in the immediate outlay). When 12 pizza pockets can be had for $5 how do we convince people to stretch their limited time and money to see that it's not about just filling that hunger void, but it's about their overall health and well being? I had to go to four different grocery stores today to buy $94.75 worth of food. I have to head out again tomorrow to return my frivolous tea purchase in order to buy broccoli. I went to a fifth grocery store yesterday to buy yogurt on sale (which means I'm actually up to $96.75 in groceries ... damn ... the tea really has to go back). My daughter said that she felt really good about this week after seeing the food all out on the kitchen counter. My son thought that $100 should have bought a lot more.